Ecclesiastical Humour

 

Thespian Muses

The Wenchoster Carol Sheet

 

The Loft Series

 

 

FUN is at the root of...

 

 

We Are the Very Model of Todays

Episcopalian

(Tune Gilbert & Sullivan, "I am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General")

 

Frank GriswoldWe are the very model of today's Episcopalian,

Were broad and high and low and wide and somewhat Bacchanalian;

Were mystic and political, and secular and clerical;

We may be charismatic, but we seldom get hysterical.

Were traditional and radical and socialist-monarchical;

Were protestant and catholic, but please, not too hierarchical.

About a woman Bishop we are split with lots of different views,

As well as on the Prayer Book that our rectors say we gotta use!

 

Chorus (3 times)

 

Gilbert and SullivanAs well as on the Prayer Book that our rectors say we gotta use!

Were prosperous by daily work; our affluence is merited,

Abetted by the little bit that some of us inherited.

The portion that we give the Church is best described as comical;

But please dont call us stingy, we are simply economical

 

Chorus

 

The portion that we give the Church is best described as comical;

But please don't call us stingy, we are simply economical.

We are the very model of todays Episcopalian!

We do our work while modestly proclaiming our own praises in Committee and Convention.

We're a competent and cheerful band

We always have a fifth around when three or four are near at hand. Were known for our diversity and heterogeneity.

(Please dont confuse that funny word with sex and spontaneity!)

On subjects controversial you wont find many who agree,

Since each Episcopalian's sure hes got Gods own authority

 

Chorus (3 times)

 

Gilbert and SullivanSince each Episcopalians sure he's got Gods own authority.

Were educated, talented, creative and professional;

So sure of our salvation that we don't need the Confessional.

Polite and open minded towards believers strange and alien,

We save up our intolerance for other Piscopalians!

 

Chorus

 

Polite and open minded towards believers strange and alien,

We save up our intolerance for other Piscopalians.

Were sophisticated talkers now on matters ecumenical,

In spite of being vague about our vows catechumenical.

The Anglican tradition is to most of us a mystery

How can we glitter socially and still find time for history?

Dont ask us what we signify with chants doxicological.

They sound so grand it must be something deeply theological!

We try to carry on with just the Parables and Golden Rule,

While hoping in the future well find time to teach in Sunday School.

 

Chorus (3 times)

 

Gilbert and SullivanWhile hoping in the future well find time to teach in Sunday School.

Our clergy do our ministries and actions apostolical,

While we argue over liturgy and colors all aesthetical,

Yet, every day, everywhere, dapper or tatterdemalion

Youll see us modeling the best todays Episcopalian.

 

Chorus

 

Yet, every day, everywhere, dapper or tatterdemalion

You'll see us modeling the best todays Episcopalian.

[Thanks to B.S. Pyle]